My Revelation

Wrap-A-Loc Set

Attention Please, Attention Please!

I have some great news that I wanted to share with everyone. Today, after 4 years of being SL'd, I signed up for the SL Consultant Training Class! My class date is November 7-10 in the Dallas/Ft. Worth, TX area. Many of you know that becoming a SL Consultant is an idea that I have tossed around for a while now. It's official now, I made my reservation today! The good news doesn't stop there...I have officially decided to change my career.

I am fed up with the Corporate America mentality and I'm leaving it behind. This past week alone, I have had persistent backaches and upset stomach from the moment I walk into my office. I have stress knots on my shoulders that never seem to go away! It's funny that I don't seem to have these head and stomachaches during the weekend (days when I'm off)...hmmm..

Thus, it's time I pursue something that I am passionate about. With all that being said...I enrolled at a local cosmetology college for the Fall semester. The program begins in December. Translation: I will be quitting my "job" by December. I would like to invite any encouraging words or food for thought.

Monica

Just June

SL 4 Years, 2 Months...Wow, I can't believe that half the year is already gone! My locks are still flourishing and growing like weeds. My longest lock reaches past the bottom of my bra line. Since my last entry, I have recovered from a bout of poison ivy! I will never again underestimate the power behind "leaves of 3"...what started out as a spot on my hand, ended up on my face, neck, arms, and back. Being the strong woman that I am, I tried treating it with conventional over-the-counter medication, but after a week and it appeared to worsen, I soon relented and quickly visited my physician! he placed me on steroid therapy (pills and ointment), and 7-10 days later, I finally saw the first sign of recovery. In total, it took me clost to a month to get rid of it. Because the poision ivy was on my face, that meant I could wear make up for a month (pic with up-do). I didn't want to risk spreading the oil to my make up brushes and causing a reoccuring infection. Some scarring still remains...

In other news, my son (pictured), experimented and took one of his locks down. We were astonished to discover that his hair reaches to his elbow! In the fall, he will be going to a technical school that forbids "exotic hairstyles". I knew he was serious about attending the school when he did not hestitate to agree to cut his locks. We're planning the cutting ceremony for August. Quite naturally, his impending decision to cut fostered the idea of me cutting again...however, the idea quickly vanished, as I do not think I can part with my locks just yet. They may want to break off and leave me; but the feeling isn't mutual-lol! At any rate, I'll be chatting soon.

Pipe Cleaners & Locks...Who Knew?

Elaine Does it again!!! I went in for a retightening; thinking I'd get the usual...wash, retightening, and back on road headed south! However, there was a wonderful surprise Elaine had in store at this session. She curled my hair with pipe cleaners (for lack of their real name)! If you look closely at the dryer pics below you can see them protruding. She simply spritzed my hair with water, curled my locks, and placed me under the dryer for about 20 minutes. It turned out beautifully! My hair felt so weightless; unlike how it feels when I curl it. This may solve my itch to cut, as I can still have the "bob" look while keeping my length. Needless to say; I will be combing the beauty supply stores or the arts/craft section at Walmart to purchase some pipe cleaners-lol! If anyone knows of a website that sells them in a bundle, please let me know....SL, 47 months and climbing!

Style and Length

These are pics of a style Elaine did at my last retightening! It took her less than 7 minutes to do it. I had no idea that she was planning to style; I don't think she did either-lol! It felt like she was just checking through my locs making sure she hadn't missed any, and the next thing I new...Wah-Lah! Isn't she awesome?

Album/Book Cover Pic-lol

I'm approaching four years of being SL'd! Time definitely flies...I am often asked how long will I let my locs grow. Honestly, it's longer than I ever anticipated it growing. The compliments continue to flow, as I continue to grow. My locs have endured many hours of tugging, fluffing, curling, straightening, washing, retightening, coloring, and styling...but mostly, they've endured and absorbed the gamma of emotions I've experienced this past year. Yet, even when I have a bad hair day; my locs are still beautiful and they speak words about me that have yet to leave my lips! My sisterlocks tell the world that no matter what I've gone through or am going through, I still stand...strong, able, and consistent at best. They tell the world, I know who I am and I have accepted me. Monica...Me, with all of my fallacies, challenges, accomplishments, and strengths...I continue.

"A true friend knows your weaknesses but shows you your strengths; feels your fears but fortifies your faith; sees your anxieties but frees your spirit; recognizes your disabilities but emphasizes your possibilities".---William Arthur Ward

Always A Lady

A Little Versitility Never Hurts...

Wild Hair Days

(old braid out), Days before retightening.

Sharing Love

3Yrs, 8 months...It's that time of the year again...time to share love to every man, woman, boy and girl! 2008 is nearing its end and many of us are reflecting on goals not accomplished, unexpected events that have arisen, and hopes for the future.

Although Thanksgiving has come and gone, let us continue to be thankful for someone or something in our lives. Don't be upset by the driver going 20 miles an hour when you're already late for work...that driver could be your guardian angel preventing you from the car accident that just occurred 10 miles up the road!

Don't be annoyed when you are called to go to an unexpected meeting or training at work...be thankful you have a job...oh, and don't forget the annual and boring safety briefing/training you're required to attend! You know, the one that you can almost recite word for word? Be thankful for that briefing/training...although the information may be repetitive to you, you never know how that information might help you help someone else! And don't get annoyed when a family member asks for financial assistance...for the second or third time. Perhaps that stimulus check or bonus check you received in the mail wasn't necessarily for you at all, but it was for you to help that family member in need.

In other words...in this individualistic society we live in...keep in mind, your life is not just your own. We must all share love, share our talents, share our knowledge and wisdom. How selfish is the person that chooses not to do so! We cannot bury our heads in the sand or attempt to live in a vacuum because I promise you, eventually...almost certainly, one day...you will be affected and effected by the same circumstances from which you hide from! It's a funny thing about us humans...we have a tendency to create the very circumstances we do not want-lol!

The Decision...for those who have been walking this journey with me, I have decided to postpone cutting my hair. I have discussed the possibility and style with my consultant, but because I am "thankful" for my thick and long locks, and thankful that it keeps the cool winter air off my neck and ears; I may not cut until the spring or summer. Stay tuned! Season's Greetings to everyone. My holiday wish for you is to have peace, clarity, and a joyous 2009!

First Time

Okay Family...I wanted to share the first time I've ever been frustrated with my locks story! Yes, I said it, "Monica is frustrated with her sisterlocks!" It only took me a little shy of four years, but it's possible and I'm human, right?

Don't get me wrong, I still love them and I still have no desire to go back to relaxed hair...If you've followed my blog then you are a witness to the various changes I've been going through over the last several months. Thus, initially, I thought the idea of cutting my locks was just another symptom of all of these changes...What do we do when we feel powerless? Change the things we can, right? So, I brushed off the urge to cut and experimented with different styles instead. Sadly, it hasn't worked. This prompted me to do some further exploring as to why I've really wanted to cut my Sisterlocks when I've spent so much time patiently waiting for them to grow...Here are my conclusions:

• While I may curl my hair (my favorite style); most times, I wear it straight or in a pony tail. The problem that has arisen is now that my hair has gotten so long, it consumes a lot of my time roller setting them (my preferred style of curling). In addition to the length, the thickness remains the same. I may start off with a pony tail in the morning, but by midday, I'm taking it down because the weight of my hair; coupled with whatever ponytail holder I'm using gives me a horrible headache! Thus, I'm strongly considering cutting my hair into a bob. A bob will give me the opportunity to curl my hair, and maybe even wear a shorter ponytail. Below is a pic of bob I want (taken from the Essence Magazine). I'm open to your thoughts and opinions, so have at it family! What do you think?......Monica

P.S. What I forgot to disclose was the fact that in the near future I will be undergoing a MAJOR career change. While training in this profession, the hair should not be below the collar. This criteria only added to my argument (smile). My next retightening isn't until November 1st and I am due for coloring...I'll keep everyone posted!

Changes

3 Years and 3 months later....Changes, changes, and more changes...although necessary; we all dislike them! I've personally endured many changes in both my personal and professional life since my last post. My final summation of it all is....God moves us out of complacency, despair, and turmoil at HIS precise timing and planning--not ours! Often times, we do not understand and cannot comprehend why things are happening and changing the way that they are, or why it's even necessary because it feels so deliberate and personal! The pity party begins, yet, no one attends but you..."Surely, no one else is going through what I'm going through!" and "How can everyone go on with their lives as normal....doesn't anyone understand that these issues are keeping me from sleeping at night?" At some point, you have to pull down the streamers and clean up after the party is over. Hope implies that there is more than one path to happiness! And while you're driving down that path you might run into some road blocks, or even run out of gas, but God blessed many of us with feet for walking--we just have to remember to use them!

Judging by the pictures, you can also see that my hair has gone through many changes (i.e. hairstyles) as well. The many hairstyles were born as a result of the Sisterlock shampoo being used on my hair during my last retightening. Great product, but it severely irritates my scalp. I was even contemplating cutting my locks short----yes, I said "cut"! If that's not a clear indication of my temporary psychosis, what else is (smile)? I finally made the executive decision to cut off the extra lock on my two-headed lock. It was my longest lock, but it was also driving me crazy! Anyone who knows me, knows that I have an obsession with even numbers and even looking objects.

Other changes included me getting; not one, but several more tattoos since my last post. Many people couldn't understand the reasoning or logic behind my sudden obsession for wanting to get inked. Family disagreed with my decision to get more tattoos, and I even had one friend threaten to stop talking to me! Are you serious? It didn't matter, as I rarely do things for other people's level of comfort or acceptance. Summer classes are over...Woo Hoo!!!! Til next post... "There are two primary choices in life; to accept conditions as they exist, or accept the responsibility for changing them"--Denis Waitley

My Accidental Beauty

June 2008---I just had to post pics of my "accidental hair style". I was trying to mimick a hair style my son uses (he has a slight variation of Brothalocks), and "WHA-LA!" I think it turned out pretty good.

I've been working out these past two months (gotta keep up with you young folk) and really needed something that would be kept out of my face and off of the back of my neck.

Guess who's back in school? Yep, I did it. I going for my second master's degree with plans to pursue both the Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist (LMFT) and Licensed Professional Counselor (LPC) certification. I need many prayers and kudos; as it will be out of my pocket and hard to climb back on the horse!!!! Muuuuaaah-I love my Sisterlocks and my chosen family!

The Charming 3's

Freshly Colored and Retightened

Hair tied up in Ponytail

"Bedtime Barbie" No time for Glamour

Taken Before Color & Retightening

"Happy Sisterlocks Anniversary/Birthday!"

3 Charming Years

Where has the time gone? The road less travelled is still leading me towards a glorious path of never ending discoveries about my strengths, challenges, and much education needed within our very own community. As an Academic Advisor at a local university that sits in the heart of a military community, I have been blessed with the opportunity of meeting various types of people with varying degrees of higher education. I'm talking about men/women who've served in war, acquired master's and doctoral degrees; acquired prestigious jobs, survived abusive relationships, or are faced with single parenthood; yet it astounds me how uneducated people are about themselves.

I've had many encounters this month already with many people wanting to know all about Sisterlocks. I must have given Elaine's phone number out to four people in one week! I don't know about any of my fellow SL family members, but I've noticed that I get the most compliments precisely at the time when I am due for a retightening! One gentleman asked, "how long does it take to put your holding gels and creams in your hair?" My reply, "huh?" He repeated himself and added, "It takes me 45 mintues to put my gels and creams in"! Shaking my head, I stopped him before he could painstakingly agonize me further...I briefly interrupted by educating him on Sisterlocks/Brotherlocks. The conversation ended with me giving him Elaine's phone number. Another encounter went as follows: "Girl, I am really really thinking about getting SL's, but I just don't know....it's just soooooo permanent and I like changing my hair too much!" I looked at this beautiful and misinformed queen and replied with, "Well sweetie, why didn't you hesitate when you 'permanently' relaxed your hair?" "Isn't that also sooooooo permanent?" Seeing the light bulb come on and clearly out of excuses, this beautiful queen stated, "Yeah, I guess your right....I don't know what it is that I'm so afraid of!" It was as if she wanted me to do something I absolutely refuse to do, "Convince her to get Sisterlocks"! I assured her that the unsettling feeling she's been wrestling with was okay and that it's part of her growth processes. The encounter ended with me leaving her with some food for thought. I asked her to think about whether her concerns, or levels of uncomfortness was due to the inability to "change her hair texture" once locked or "change her hair style"? As many SL family members will tell you; style versatility is unlimited! As wrinkles of wisdom decorated her forehead, I handed her the Sisterlocks web address and Elaine's phone number (for at least the 5th time) before she departed my office. Both encounters took place at my office, and both initially came into my office with their academic concerns (or so they said). These two students reminded me of some of the reasons why I have distinguished myself as an Academic Counselor, and not an Advisor. There is a major difference between the two. Advisors tell people what to do, while counselors empower people by giving them adequate information, and or, resources to make their own informed choices. Anyone in the field of social services will tell you that the "presenting problem" is rarely an isolated event. Meaning, there are many other areas that are interrelated and can affect both your professional and personal life. A student may come into my office on the premises of finding out how many classes they need to complete their degree, or are having conflict with one of their instructors. When truthfully, the source of their problem may stem from them struggling with their identity, personality conflicts, or lack of support at home. There are a number of reasons why someone may end up in my office, especially when their visits are frequent and are not required. I suppose my mother gave me the perfect name: Monica, Latin for advisor/counselor-go figure!

However, because I started this blog on the premises of helping me through the struggles, frustrations and triumphs throughout my hair journey, I'll try to focus on topical conversations and thoughts related to hair. The key word being "try" (smile). Many of us know that we do not live in a vacuum, and thus, although I'd love nothing more than to just talk about hair; there are many interrelating factors that could affect thoughts and feelings about hair.

April 14, 2008 is my third year anniversary/birthday, and thus, I will discuss interesting three's. Let's have some fun:

3 Things About Me You Probably Never Knew:

1. 
   
   I used to weigh over 200 lbs (before kids), and shamefully, I must admit that I don't exercise and I have a poor diet...but will start on Monday (smile)!


2. 
   
   I always wanted to be a singer or model when I was a child (who hasn't, right?)


3. 
   
   My eyebrows have almost completely thinned out...I have permanent make-up (eye-liner and eyebrows)...and thank God for Mary Kay Cosmetics to conceal signs of aging (smile)!

3 Things About My Hair You Probably Never Knew:

1. 
   
   I have no gray hair (yet)


2. 
   
   Even after 3 years, some of my hair is not locked yet


3. 
   
   I will probably never take the retightening class because I have Carpal Tunnel, which may prevent me from completing my entire head
   

3 Pet Peeves:

1. 
   
   Crowded places


2. 
   
   Disorganization


3. 
   
   When people dissect me and presume that I am mixed with another race. For example, I often hear..."anyone can tell you're mixed with something because of your nose...it's not a typical black nose" or "your hair isn't nappy like ours" or "you look white; look at your skin complexion" or "you can't be all black because black people can't grow long hair"! It drives me insane!

While it's true that I am technically 25% white (grandfather was white), in my opinion, I am mixed like most other African Americans in this country! I was raised in the African American culture, and therefore, that is the race I identify with.

Before closing I'll offer my words of wisdom for those people still contemplating on whether or not to lock their hair.....The answer you're seeking can only come from "you"! Whether you decide to go natural, get Sisterlocks or Traditional Locks, it's clearly a personal choice. You have to embrace and accept yourself for who you are...today, not who you used to be or who you're going to be! Hair does not "make" you, "you" make hair! It is not about hair my lovlies, it has always been about attitude and belief in yourself. Guess what? Having long or straight hair will not guarantee you a job, or the ability to keep a man. A man will leave you and your long/straight hair for a bald-headed woman who knows herself and is comfortable with herself! Deciding to change (be it your hair or bad habits) is an internal process that is reflected externally. Start with loving and sharing the uniqueness you possess! How selfish of us not to share the knowledge we acquire or our special god-given gifts. A good friend of mine was reminded of this one day while visiting a cemetary. As she carefully walked the graveyard and viewed the various headstones, an angel spoke to her and said, "My child do you see all of the people that rest here?" "Think of all of the words not spoken and never to be heard; think of all the knowledge acquired and never to be shared!" The angel begged her not to follow suit, and be the voice of knowledge. She was so inspired by that experience that she is currently writing a book to help empower women! My point is, when you do not share "you and your experiences" however minuscule they may seem; you have misunderstood your purpose here on earth! We are all interrelated and interconnected, and purposely so!