The Makings of Monica

Loc Free

2011-08-15T10:58:00.011-05:00

Pre Cut: 05 August 2011

Hair Still Wet; Hair Products Still Visible

Lovin' My Curls

Half Gone! Yikes...No Turning Back

All Gone! I Need To Lift the Black Dye ASAP!

Yep, I did it! After 6.5 years, I cut off my sisterlocks! Although I'm still adjusting to the shorter length, I LOVE IT! Every day I awake to learning new things about my natural hair; what products and conditioners work well and what doesn't! I must say, that since cutting my locs, I have discovered that I have more 4A hair than I originally thought. 4B hair generally resides in my nape and front hairline; however, 4A hair is located mostly on the crown and sides of my scalp...very interesting indeed! My hair length is approximately 1 - 1.5 inches in length. Quite naturally, it's longer at the crown.

I actually have a confession, my son that you see behind me in the picture cut most of them off. I was exhausted after cutting the first section! So, thank you Brittan! I cannot tell you how good it felt to have someone rub their fingers through my scalp..he put me to sleep-lol! It's been over 6 years since I've had a comb touch my scalp! Wow, how amazing! We were both surprised at how soft and baby fine my natural hair felt.

I ended up going to a hairstylist who help me lift the black dye out of my hair and she put a bronze color on top. I could tell she didn't have much experience with natural hair as she shampoo'd with regular shampoo and proceeded to put products on my hair that just sat up there and stared back at her-lol. As soon as I got home, I cowashed with Herbal Essence Hello Hydration to add back the moisture to my hair that had been stripped by the shampoo. I immediately followed with Knot Today by Kinky Curly and the Kinky Curly Curling Custard (KCCC). I was amazed at how my curls popped and were defined by those products! I also used a little EcoStyler Gel along the hairline for a smoother look. I did have to learn the hard way that using too much of the KCC products will definitely leave a residue upon drying...yuck!

My daily regimen thus far includes taking Nzuri hair elixir vitamins (will post more on this phenomenal product at a later date), http://www.buynzuri.com/ I cowash with either the Herbal Essence Conditioner (mentioned above), or Yes to Carrots Conditioner, or Wen Conditioner products. I haven't determined which conditioner will be my staple conditioner yet. While hair is dripping wet, I apply the Knot Today and the KCCC, with a little EcoStyler Gel along the edges. That pretty much it. I'm sure as my hair grows and as the weather gets colder this regimen will change drastically. In the meantime, I am still happy to be nappy and I finally feel totally free!

Beginning A New Journey

2011-06-11T17:48:00.004-05:00

Starting A New Journey

It's been close to year since I've last posted. Since that time I've done a lot of soul searching about life (i.e, my career, relationships, and hair). I've finally been accepted to the nursing program at a local community college and I will be leaving my employer after nearly 11 years. It's time for me to reinvent myself. I haven't been happy, not even content at my job in the past 4 years and I've discovered that instead of waiting for them to change, perhaps it was me who needed to change. So, with that said, this fall I will be walking away from the corporate world.

Additionally, for many of you who have followed my blog, this next piece of news may be earth shattering for some of you. I am ending my Sisterlock journey! Tomorrow, Sunday, June 12, 2011 I will start to the tedious task of taking down my sisterlocks! No, I have not lost my mind, but I have a new desire. I've toyed with ending my journey over this past year. I had hoped that when I cut my locks it would curb the burning desire, but it hasn't. You see, when I started my natural hair journey over 7 years ago, I had the intention of discovering and exploring my natural hair and learning how to take care of my own hair without the dependence on another or on relaxers. I achieved half of what I set out to do. I want to experience natural free, flowing, and loose hair. I've realized that for me, locking my hair, kept me in bondage and it kept me away from rediscovering my true, free flowing hair pattern. Don't get me wrong, I do love Sisterlocks and I've enjoyed this wonderful journey, but I am ready to take off the training wheels and fly!

I do realize that the task I'm taking on is tremendous and it may take me possibly months to accomplish, but nonetheless, I will accomplish it! It is my goal to have my locks freed by my birthday in October. I hope I will be able to take at least 5 locks out a day; at least 5 days a week. I hope to be able to document this new journey as I have done with this one. Stay tuned..

Cold Winter Months

2010-11-16T09:54:00.003-06:00

A 67' Classic

Last month I turned another year older- 43...whew! (and wiser). I am still enjoying the shorter length. I have noticed that it's already starting to grow back. Will I allow it to grow as long as previously? I'm not sure. Anyway, Happy Holidays to my blogger family.

Summer Ending

2010-09-07T13:52:00.003-05:00

September 2010
5 yrs and 5 months lock'd

The end of summer is almost here! I've had a great summer. Let's recap... in nearly 6 years, I finally took a trip back East to visit my family, added more tattoo's, cut my hair, and now, out of my 4 children; 3 have graduated and moved on, and now I have one remaining in high school. I'm still working out; toned and lost the winter weight, and still taking classes to exercise my brain. I may be rare in that I will miss the 100 degree temperature here in Texas. It did nothing for my electric bill or my grass, but I absolutely love sunshine and heat! My hair has been short for almost 2 months now and I don't miss the longer locs (so far). I am curling it a lot more, as I suspected I would. Til next month..

My First Cut in Over 5 Years

2010-07-31T21:51:00.010-05:00

I Finally Did It! After months and months of deliberation; I got the nerve to cut my hair! I am so glad I did it. I feel like I've been freed again (if that is possible). I remember how I waited with anticipation for my hair to get long enough to put into a ponytail, or to even feel it on the back of my neck. However, the things I didn't consider would later turn out to be the reasons for cutting. The length began to weigh me down. I began to notice headaches when I'd wear ponytails because of the tension and weight. I would wake in the mornings with neck pain from tying my hair up and night. I could not keep a good shower cap that would last or even cover my hair. I also noticed that I stopped curling my hair because of it would take nearly all day to do and the curls would eventually drop because of the weight. Ultimately, my overall attitude towards my hair began to shift. I wasn't as thrilled about my sisterlocks like I used to be, but now all of that has changed! While longer locks may be okay for some, in this journey I discovered that it's not for me; at least not anymore. And who knows, this too, could change...but that's what journey's are all about...growing, discovering and changing. I embrace it wholeheartedly!

Bronze Again

2010-05-10T09:09:00.006-05:00

Ahh, now I'm feeling more like myself again! I got my hair retightened and the color touched up! I didn't realize how badly I needed the color touched up until I started wearing my spring clothing collection. It's been about 7-8 weeks since my last retightening, which always makes me feel like I did when I had a relaxer--in need of a touch up! I found myself saying things like, "Oh Wow, I have a lot of new growth; I need my hair done bad!" My friends who are still addicted to the "creamy crack" would look at me strangely as if I was on illegal substances. It finally dawned on me that they could not understand how I could have "new growth" if my entire head is nappy-lol! New growth to them equates to nappiness; while new growth to me means exactly that...newly grown hair that needs to be tightened.

I don't know about any of my SL sisters, but even after 5 years of being locked; I still get extremely annoyed when someone makes comments to me like, "I love your dreads!" I have matured in the sense that I no longer correct them on the spot. Most times, I just smile, and respond with "thanks"! However, when the subsequent questions begin to follow like, "Where do you go to get your dreads done, or How much did it cost to get your dreads started?" It is then I curtly respond with Sisterlocks in every answer, and finally, when I've noticed that they're still confused; yet fascinated, I just refer them to the SL web site.

Interestingly enough, when I get comments like that from my family; I am more tolerable. For example, I was fortunate enough to fly home to NJ last month to visit my family. I hadn't been home since 2006. Keep in my mind my mother is almost 70 years old, half African American and half Caucasian; with Caucasian textured hair. While my hair was much shorter the last time I was home, my family saw my SL's and no one commented. However, the night before I was due to leave my mother asked, "What is that you're wearing on your head?" Shocked that she asked me this after seeing my hair locked in all this time, I responded with, "Huh?" She repeated herself. I replied, "Mom, this is MY hair; this is not a wig or hair piece-lol!" Then she said, "Well, what do you have to do to get it back to 'normal'?" All I could do was laugh at the realization that she really had no clue about locked hair; let alone any rememberance about what was considered "normal" for my hair texture! I eventually, exlained it all to her. Then she proceeded to take pictures of my hair, as I'm sure that she wanted to tell all of her friends about her baby with the nappy hair (smile)! I love and miss you mom!

Happy 5 Year Anniversary To Me!

2010-04-15T15:01:00.004-05:00

Wow! I can't believe my 5-year Loc-Anniversary is here (14 April 2010)! My locs now reach to the middle of my back. I still haven't gotten up the nerves to cut, but maybe one day. I definitely cannot envision and do not want to grow my locks past my waist. The older I get; I just want simplicity. Much love to all...til next time...be blessed.

My First Hand Made Loc-n-Tie

2010-02-06T21:54:00.005-06:00

Hello Everyone,

I wanted to try and make my own hair tie; as so many others seem to be doing the same. And wa-la, this is my first one that I am coining a "Loc-n-Tie". I tested it in my hair and it works just as good as the ones I've purchased online. Who woulda thunk? I hope to get better in time and I need to find supplies. I found those supplies at Hobby Lobby, which there wasn't a huge variety to choose from. Til next post...Have a great one!

Happy New Beginnings

2010-01-27T10:22:00.009-06:00

Hair Trim

Locscrunchie Shower Cap for Long Locs

Hello Everyone! I haven't forgotten you. I've been battling some issues in my personal life and I'm just now coming up for air. Also I am guilty as charged! I've been frequenting Facebook and spend most of my journal time there. I do have some more pics to post, so stay tuned. Ms. Elaine trimmed my hair before the christmas holidays and I am loving the length now that it is a little more even. I love and miss everyone.

Retightening Class

2009-11-16T21:25:00.002-06:00

4 Years and 7 months later; I finally decided to take the SL Retightening class in Irving, TX. Due to unforeseen economic reasons, I could not take the consultant class as originally planned, so I opted for the alternative. Needless to say, besides the trainers, I was the oldest one...not chronologically; but in terms of my SL Rebirth. Many of the ladies wondered why I waited so long to take the class, and others looked at my locs with astonishment and eyes full of hope for their baby locs. The class was taught by Master Trainer, Ms. Michelle Bryant. Unfortunately, I could not practice much on my own hair because I recently had it retightened. However, I was still able to grasp the concept of the technique. Let's just say, I have a renewed respect and appreciation for my consultant! While the technique is not difficult to learn, at this point in time; I do not foresee me taking on the project of retightening my entire head and potentially jeopardizing the integrity of all the work my consultant has done thus far. This is largely due to the density of my hair. Thus, I will continue to drive to Dallas for my retightenings.

Curls, Curls, Curls

2009-10-12T11:05:00.003-05:00

Just wanted to post some pics of my curls. I haven't attempted to curl my hair in a very long time due to the length, thickness, and time that it consumes. It was worth it; I think it came out great! I used the soft spikes curlers; however, I have run out of space as my hair has grown a lot since I last curled it! Oh, BTW, I finally ordered a shower cap from http://stores.soclocsock.com/StoreFront.bok made specifically for long locks! Yay!!!! I am so tired of having to wear two caps just to cover my hair in the shower. I will let everyone know my thoughts on it once I receive it.

Happy 42nd to Me!

2009-10-06T16:08:00.005-05:00

Another birthday gone by! I can possibly name 42 reasons why I'm thankful for living to see another year and 42 reasons why I probably should not have. However, it only takes one second to say that I am thankful that HE chose to bless me with anger, pain, joy, patience/impatience, and one of the most unforgettable year's that I have had! They are tiny reminders that I AM still living and there is opportunity to make a difference--Still locking and still loving! What could be better than that?

SL, 4 years 6 months

My Revelation

2009-06-23T14:26:00.008-05:00

Wrap-A-Loc Set

Attention Please, Attention Please!

I have some great news that I wanted to share with everyone. Today, after 4 years of being SL'd, I signed up for the SL Consultant Training Class! My class date is November 7-10 in the Dallas/Ft. Worth, TX area. Many of you know that becoming a SL Consultant is an idea that I have tossed around for a while now. It's official now, I made my reservation today! The good news doesn't stop there...I have officially decided to change my career.

I am fed up with the Corporate America mentality and I'm leaving it behind. This past week alone, I have had persistent backaches and upset stomach from the moment I walk into my office. I have stress knots on my shoulders that never seem to go away! It's funny that I don't seem to have these head and stomachaches during the weekend (days when I'm off)...hmmm..

Thus, it's time I pursue something that I am passionate about. With all that being said...I enrolled at a local cosmetology college for the Fall semester. The program begins in December. Translation: I will be quitting my "job" by December. I would like to invite any encouraging words or food for thought.

Monica

Just June

2009-06-01T16:14:00.009-05:00

SL 4 Years, 2 Months...Wow, I can't believe that half the year is already gone! My locks are still flourishing and growing like weeds. My longest lock reaches past the bottom of my bra line. Since my last entry, I have recovered from a bout of poison ivy! I will never again underestimate the power behind "leaves of 3"...what started out as a spot on my hand, ended up on my face, neck, arms, and back. Being the strong woman that I am, I tried treating it with conventional over-the-counter medication, but after a week and it appeared to worsen, I soon relented and quickly visited my physician! he placed me on steroid therapy (pills and ointment), and 7-10 days later, I finally saw the first sign of recovery. In total, it took me clost to a month to get rid of it. Because the poision ivy was on my face, that meant I could wear make up for a month (pic with up-do). I didn't want to risk spreading the oil to my make up brushes and causing a reoccuring infection. Some scarring still remains...

In other news, my son (pictured), experimented and took one of his locks down. We were astonished to discover that his hair reaches to his elbow! In the fall, he will be going to a technical school that forbids "exotic hairstyles". I knew he was serious about attending the school when he did not hestitate to agree to cut his locks. We're planning the cutting ceremony for August. Quite naturally, his impending decision to cut fostered the idea of me cutting again...however, the idea quickly vanished, as I do not think I can part with my locks just yet. They may want to break off and leave me; but the feeling isn't mutual-lol! At any rate, I'll be chatting soon.

Pipe Cleaners & Locks...Who Knew?

2009-03-23T10:43:00.004-05:00

Elaine Does it again!!! I went in for a retightening; thinking I'd get the usual...wash, retightening, and back on road headed south! However, there was a wonderful surprise Elaine had in store at this session. She curled my hair with pipe cleaners (for lack of their real name)! If you look closely at the dryer pics below you can see them protruding. She simply spritzed my hair with water, curled my locks, and placed me under the dryer for about 20 minutes. It turned out beautifully! My hair felt so weightless; unlike how it feels when I curl it. This may solve my itch to cut, as I can still have the "bob" look while keeping my length. Needless to say; I will be combing the beauty supply stores or the arts/craft section at Walmart to purchase some pipe cleaners-lol! If anyone knows of a website that sells them in a bundle, please let me know....SL, 47 months and climbing!

Style and Length

2009-02-27T10:18:00.007-06:00

These are pics of a style Elaine did at my last retightening! It took her less than 7 minutes to do it. I had no idea that she was planning to style; I don't think she did either-lol! It felt like she was just checking through my locs making sure she hadn't missed any, and the next thing I new...Wah-Lah! Isn't she awesome?

2009-02-24T16:30:00.011-06:00

Album/Book Cover Pic-lol

I'm approaching four years of being SL'd! Time definitely flies...I am often asked how long will I let my locs grow. Honestly, it's longer than I ever anticipated it growing. The compliments continue to flow, as I continue to grow. My locs have endured many hours of tugging, fluffing, curling, straightening, washing, retightening, coloring, and styling...but mostly, they've endured and absorbed the gamma of emotions I've experienced this past year. Yet, even when I have a bad hair day; my locs are still beautiful and they speak words about me that have yet to leave my lips! My sisterlocks tell the world that no matter what I've gone through or am going through, I still stand...strong, able, and consistent at best. They tell the world, I know who I am and I have accepted me. Monica...Me, with all of my fallacies, challenges, accomplishments, and strengths...I continue.

"A true friend knows your weaknesses but shows you your strengths; feels your fears but fortifies your faith; sees your anxieties but frees your spirit; recognizes your disabilities but emphasizes your possibilities".---William Arthur Ward

Always A Lady

A Little Versitility Never Hurts...

Wild Hair Days

(old braid out), Days before retightening.

Sharing Love

2008-12-03T09:28:00.020-06:00

3Yrs, 8 months...It's that time of the year again...time to share love to every man, woman, boy and girl! 2008 is nearing its end and many of us are reflecting on goals not accomplished, unexpected events that have arisen, and hopes for the future.

Although Thanksgiving has come and gone, let us continue to be thankful for someone or something in our lives. Don't be upset by the driver going 20 miles an hour when you're already late for work...that driver could be your guardian angel preventing you from the car accident that just occurred 10 miles up the road!

Don't be annoyed when you are called to go to an unexpected meeting or training at work...be thankful you have a job...oh, and don't forget the annual and boring safety briefing/training you're required to attend! You know, the one that you can almost recite word for word? Be thankful for that briefing/training...although the information may be repetitive to you, you never know how that information might help you help someone else! And don't get annoyed when a family member asks for financial assistance...for the second or third time. Perhaps that stimulus check or bonus check you received in the mail wasn't necessarily for you at all, but it was for you to help that family member in need.

In other words...in this individualistic society we live in...keep in mind, your life is not just your own. We must all share love, share our talents, share our knowledge and wisdom. How selfish is the person that chooses not to do so! We cannot bury our heads in the sand or attempt to live in a vacuum because I promise you, eventually...almost certainly, one day...you will be affected and effected by the same circumstances from which you hide from! It's a funny thing about us humans...we have a tendency to create the very circumstances we do not want-lol!

The Decision...for those who have been walking this journey with me, I have decided to postpone cutting my hair. I have discussed the possibility and style with my consultant, but because I am "thankful" for my thick and long locks, and thankful that it keeps the cool winter air off my neck and ears; I may not cut until the spring or summer. Stay tuned! Season's Greetings to everyone. My holiday wish for you is to have peace, clarity, and a joyous 2009!

First Time

2008-09-24T13:33:00.004-05:00

Okay Family...I wanted to share the first time I've ever been frustrated with my locks story! Yes, I said it, "Monica is frustrated with her sisterlocks!" It only took me a little shy of four years, but it's possible and I'm human, right?

Don't get me wrong, I still love them and I still have no desire to go back to relaxed hair...If you've followed my blog then you are a witness to the various changes I've been going through over the last several months. Thus, initially, I thought the idea of cutting my locks was just another symptom of all of these changes...What do we do when we feel powerless? Change the things we can, right? So, I brushed off the urge to cut and experimented with different styles instead. Sadly, it hasn't worked. This prompted me to do some further exploring as to why I've really wanted to cut my Sisterlocks when I've spent so much time patiently waiting for them to grow...Here are my conclusions:

While I may curl my hair (my favorite style); most times, I wear it straight or in a pony tail. The problem that has arisen is now that my hair has gotten so long, it consumes a lot of my time roller setting them (my preferred style of curling). In addition to the length, the thickness remains the same. I may start off with a pony tail in the morning, but by midday, I'm taking it down because the weight of my hair; coupled with whatever ponytail holder I'm using gives me a horrible headache! Thus, I'm strongly considering cutting my hair into a bob. A bob will give me the opportunity to curl my hair, and maybe even wear a shorter ponytail. Below is a pic of bob I want (taken from the Essence Magazine). I'm open to your thoughts and opinions, so have at it family! What do you think?......Monica

P.S. What I forgot to disclose was the fact that in the near future I will be undergoing a MAJOR career change. While training in this profession, the hair should not be below the collar. This criteria only added to my argument (smile). My next retightening isn't until November 1st and I am due for coloring...I'll keep everyone posted!

Changes

2008-08-05T13:08:00.009-05:00

3 Years and 3 months later....Changes, changes, and more changes...although necessary; we all dislike them! I've personally endured many changes in both my personal and professional life since my last post. My final summation of it all is....God moves us out of complacency, despair, and turmoil at HIS precise timing and planning--not ours! Often times, we do not understand and cannot comprehend why things are happening and changing the way that they are, or why it's even necessary because it feels so deliberate and personal! The pity party begins, yet, no one attends but you..."Surely, no one else is going through what I'm going through!" and "How can everyone go on with their lives as normal....doesn't anyone understand that these issues are keeping me from sleeping at night?" At some point, you have to pull down the streamers and clean up after the party is over. Hope implies that there is more than one path to happiness! And while you're driving down that path you might run into some road blocks, or even run out of gas, but God blessed many of us with feet for walking--we just have to remember to use them!

Judging by the pictures, you can also see that my hair has gone through many changes (i.e. hairstyles) as well. The many hairstyles were born as a result of the Sisterlock shampoo being used on my hair during my last retightening. Great product, but it severely irritates my scalp. I was even contemplating cutting my locks short----yes, I said "cut"! If that's not a clear indication of my temporary psychosis, what else is (smile)? I finally made the executive decision to cut off the extra lock on my two-headed lock. It was my longest lock, but it was also driving me crazy! Anyone who knows me, knows that I have an obsession with even numbers and even looking objects.

Other changes included me getting; not one, but several more tattoos since my last post. Many people couldn't understand the reasoning or logic behind my sudden obsession for wanting to get inked. Family disagreed with my decision to get more tattoos, and I even had one friend threaten to stop talking to me! Are you serious? It didn't matter, as I rarely do things for other people's level of comfort or acceptance. Summer classes are over...Woo Hoo!!!! Til next post... "There are two primary choices in life; to accept conditions as they exist, or accept the responsibility for changing them"--Denis Waitley

My Accidental Beauty

2008-06-02T20:16:00.000-05:00

June 2008---I just had to post pics of my "accidental hair style". I was trying to mimick a hair style my son uses (he has a slight variation of Brothalocks), and "WHA-LA!" I think it turned out pretty good.

I've been working out these past two months (gotta keep up with you young folk) and really needed something that would be kept out of my face and off of the back of my neck.

Guess who's back in school? Yep, I did it. I going for my second master's degree with plans to pursue both the Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist (LMFT) and Licensed Professional Counselor (LPC) certification. I need many prayers and kudos; as it will be out of my pocket and hard to climb back on the horse!!!! Muuuuaaah-I love my Sisterlocks and my chosen family!

The Charming 3's

2008-04-11T08:14:00.000-05:00

Freshly Colored and Retightened

Hair tied up in Ponytail

"Bedtime Barbie" No time for Glamour

Taken Before Color & Retightening

"Happy Sisterlocks Anniversary/Birthday!"

3 Charming Years

Where has the time gone? The road less travelled is still leading me towards a glorious path of never ending discoveries about my strengths, challenges, and much education needed within our very own community. As an Academic Advisor at a local university that sits in the heart of a military community, I have been blessed with the opportunity of meeting various types of people with varying degrees of higher education. I'm talking about men/women who've served in war, acquired master's and doctoral degrees; acquired prestigious jobs, survived abusive relationships, or are faced with single parenthood; yet it astounds me how uneducated people are about themselves.

I've had many encounters this month already with many people wanting to know all about Sisterlocks. I must have given Elaine's phone number out to four people in one week! I don't know about any of my fellow SL family members, but I've noticed that I get the most compliments precisely at the time when I am due for a retightening! One gentleman asked, "how long does it take to put your holding gels and creams in your hair?" My reply, "huh?" He repeated himself and added, "It takes me 45 mintues to put my gels and creams in"! Shaking my head, I stopped him before he could painstakingly agonize me further...I briefly interrupted by educating him on Sisterlocks/Brotherlocks. The conversation ended with me giving him Elaine's phone number. Another encounter went as follows: "Girl, I am really really thinking about getting SL's, but I just don't know....it's just soooooo permanent and I like changing my hair too much!" I looked at this beautiful and misinformed queen and replied with, "Well sweetie, why didn't you hesitate when you 'permanently' relaxed your hair?" "Isn't that also sooooooo permanent?" Seeing the light bulb come on and clearly out of excuses, this beautiful queen stated, "Yeah, I guess your right....I don't know what it is that I'm so afraid of!" It was as if she wanted me to do something I absolutely refuse to do, "Convince her to get Sisterlocks"! I assured her that the unsettling feeling she's been wrestling with was okay and that it's part of her growth processes. The encounter ended with me leaving her with some food for thought. I asked her to think about whether her concerns, or levels of uncomfortness was due to the inability to "change her hair texture" once locked or "change her hair style"? As many SL family members will tell you; style versatility is unlimited! As wrinkles of wisdom decorated her forehead, I handed her the Sisterlocks web address and Elaine's phone number (for at least the 5th time) before she departed my office. Both encounters took place at my office, and both initially came into my office with their academic concerns (or so they said). These two students reminded me of some of the reasons why I have distinguished myself as an Academic Counselor, and not an Advisor. There is a major difference between the two. Advisors tell people what to do, while counselors empower people by giving them adequate information, and or, resources to make their own informed choices. Anyone in the field of social services will tell you that the "presenting problem" is rarely an isolated event. Meaning, there are many other areas that are interrelated and can affect both your professional and personal life. A student may come into my office on the premises of finding out how many classes they need to complete their degree, or are having conflict with one of their instructors. When truthfully, the source of their problem may stem from them struggling with their identity, personality conflicts, or lack of support at home. There are a number of reasons why someone may end up in my office, especially when their visits are frequent and are not required. I suppose my mother gave me the perfect name: Monica, Latin for advisor/counselor-go figure!

However, because I started this blog on the premises of helping me through the struggles, frustrations and triumphs throughout my hair journey, I'll try to focus on topical conversations and thoughts related to hair. The key word being "try" (smile). Many of us know that we do not live in a vacuum, and thus, although I'd love nothing more than to just talk about hair; there are many interrelating factors that could affect thoughts and feelings about hair.

April 14, 2008 is my third year anniversary/birthday, and thus, I will discuss interesting three's. Let's have some fun:

3 Things About Me You Probably Never Knew:

I used to weigh over 200 lbs (before kids), and shamefully, I must admit that I don't exercise and I have a poor diet...but will start on Monday (smile)!

I always wanted to be a singer or model when I was a child (who hasn't, right?)

My eyebrows have almost completely thinned out...I have permanent make-up (eye-liner and eyebrows)...and thank God for Mary Kay Cosmetics to conceal signs of aging (smile)!

3 Things About My Hair You Probably Never Knew:

I have no gray hair (yet)

Even after 3 years, some of my hair is not locked yet

I will probably never take the retightening class because I have Carpal Tunnel, which may prevent me from completing my entire head

3 Pet Peeves:

Crowded places

Disorganization

When people dissect me and presume that I am mixed with another race. For example, I often hear..."anyone can tell you're mixed with something because of your nose...it's not a typical black nose" or "your hair isn't nappy like ours" or "you look white; look at your skin complexion" or "you can't be all black because black people can't grow long hair"! It drives me insane!

While it's true that I am technically 25% white (grandfather was white), in my opinion, I am mixed like most other African Americans in this country! I was raised in the African American culture, and therefore, that is the race I identify with.

Before closing I'll offer my words of wisdom for those people still contemplating on whether or not to lock their hair.....The answer you're seeking can only come from "you"! Whether you decide to go natural, get Sisterlocks or Traditional Locks, it's clearly a personal choice. You have to embrace and accept yourself for who you are...today, not who you used to be or who you're going to be! Hair does not "make" you, "you" make hair! It is not about hair my lovlies, it has always been about attitude and belief in yourself. Guess what? Having long or straight hair will not guarantee you a job, or the ability to keep a man. A man will leave you and your long/straight hair for a bald-headed woman who knows herself and is comfortable with herself! Deciding to change (be it your hair or bad habits) is an internal process that is reflected externally. Start with loving and sharing the uniqueness you possess! How selfish of us not to share the knowledge we acquire or our special god-given gifts. A good friend of mine was reminded of this one day while visiting a cemetary. As she carefully walked the graveyard and viewed the various headstones, an angel spoke to her and said, "My child do you see all of the people that rest here?" "Think of all of the words not spoken and never to be heard; think of all the knowledge acquired and never to be shared!" The angel begged her not to follow suit, and be the voice of knowledge. She was so inspired by that experience that she is currently writing a book to help empower women! My point is, when you do not share "you and your experiences" however minuscule they may seem; you have misunderstood your purpose here on earth! We are all interrelated and interconnected, and purposely so!

First Locked-Give Me My Free Repost!!

2008-04-01T13:54:00.000-05:00

Single Strand Twists

Day After SLs 14 April 2005

I was rummaging through my old cyber-attic and came across these old pics and decided to repost them and this blog entry for several reasons...my upcoming 3rd year SL birthday is near, and I wanted to once again, visually step back and see my progress...stay posted, I'm due for a retightening and color this weekend and I will post my 3rd birthday pics as soon as possible.

8 Months (Natural)

2/5/2005

I know it's been a while, but now that Christmas holidays have passed, things are settling back into "norm". I can't post any pics because my digital camera is broken. Currently, I am wearing micro braids that were put in around mid-December. When I measured my hair last month, it measured around 3-3.5 inches in the back. I'm sure it's a little longer at the crown. My edges are still very fine and easy to break, so my stylist is being extra careful not to braid too tight. She's awesome! I've been trying to convince her to take the Sisterlock's training course, but I don't think she's interested, as she is wearing traditional locks.

I have some great news; I made my initial consultation appointment for my SL's on March 12th with a consultant named Elaine Hill in Dallas. I plan on starting the journey in April. I was going to go with a guy named Greg Day but I've been getting the feeling that he really doesn't want to do it. I contacted him earlier this week to try to set up my consultation appointment; in addition, I informed him that I was wearing micros. He immediately told me to take the micro braids out because they damage the hair shaft; and thus, make for weaker SL's! Needless to say I was shocked. You would think that daily stress and manipulation would be more damaging than micro braids. I could see if I used synthetic hair, which contains fibers that cut/damage human hair, but everyone knows with micros, human hair is used! In search for some guidance, I went to my online SL group to see if anyone else knew about this so-called damage to the hair shaft. Two people responded. One female also said she was sporting micro braids until she grew out adequate length and the other was a male who pretty much said that it sounded like the consultant didn't know much about natural hair! He also suggested I search for other consultants. This is how I ended up making the appointment with Elaine.

The consultation fee is $25.00. It should take me about 2-3 hours to get to her shop. The way I see it, it'll be like taking a mini-vacation. By the time I lock, my hair should be around 4-5 inches. I'll probably go through one more set of micros before taking them out.I mentioned to my spouse about getting SL's, and of course, he translated it to "dredlocks". I tried my best to explain the difference to him, and his response was, "I don't think you want to do that!" When I told him it was a way to wear my hair chemical-free and still be able to take advantage of different hairstyles he responded, "Your hair ain't that bad, you don't need to put in chemicals anyway!" Nothing burns me more than to hear people refer to hair as "good" or "bad", as if it is alive and has behavior issues! People, my beautiful black people, news flash "HAIR IS DEAD"! Of course, that's with the exception of the root. Sensing I was defeated, I ended the conversation with, "I'll tell you more about it when you come back from Iraq!"

14 April 2005-Give Me My Free!!

Well, I finally did it. It took 11.5 hours to lock my 4.5 inches of hair. I'm still floating on cloud nine. I couldn't believe how thick my hair was and how little scalp actually shows through! Most people hardly notice it, and I would imagine that's because of the short length—give me a couple of years and they'll be all over me. My husband and children love it, and so do my co-workers. My consultant told me to do absolutely nothing to do for the next few weeks, no oils, no washing—nothing! If it begins to itch, she told me to spray it with distilled water; add Sea Breeze if it gets out of control (itching). I have to go back in two weeks so she can show me how to carefully wash it to avoid slippage. After that, I only have to go back every 4-6 weeks for retightenings. I'll definitely keep you posted on my progress.

Happy Valentine's Day!

2008-02-14T10:13:00.000-06:00

Happy Valentine's Day! Yeah okay...

Wow! I can't believe lover's day is already upon us. Personally, I think Valentine's Day commercialism is highly overrated! No, I'm not hating or upset because I don't have a man-- because actually I do . It's just that the older I get, the more my eyes have opened up to the reality of my surroundings. Why do we let society dictate to us when, where, and how we should celebrate our love with our significant others? When you're with the right person, Valentine's is not just a single day; it's every day that you spend with that person!

Men/women buy into the hype of having to get their loved one flowers that will die, candy that may go to the hips, or a piece of jewelry that is often overpriced and loses it's value as soon as you wrap it up in the box! All of this to show how much they care....I think not!

So many people go out and purchase gifted items that meant nothing to them the day before Valentine's Day and will mean nothing to them the day after-lol! What is really needed for Valentine's Day (every day for that matter) cannot be given by a man or woman! Unconditional love and pure forgiveness for our mishaps and wrongdoings! Simply put-God's love. At any rate, for those who enjoy the commercialism of Valentine's Day -may you enjoy your 24 hours.

Happy Holidays!!

2007-12-19T13:04:00.001-06:00

Above is my rendition of Mrs. Claus (smile)! I've been locked now for 2 years and 8 months and the journey has yet ceased to amaze me! You can faintly see my two-week old twist-out style in the pics. Also, you will note that my dark brown-almost black hair dye that I had done a few months ago lost its battle (smile).

Let's see...this month....aaahh, December, the month full of vicarious joy and love ALONE I have been stopped many many times and asked the same FOUR questions:

Is that your real hair?
Are those "twisties"?
Who does your hair?
If you wanted to change your 'hairstyle', you would have to cut them off, huh?

The conversation generally ends with, "I really like those a lot; it's exactly what I'm looking to do with my hair but I like to change my hair too much!" After hearing those same questions repeatedly and my efforts to educate those inquiring minds; I relentlessly give in and refer them to the Sisterlocks web site and internally shake my head.....boy, will we ever stop being a slave to all of that negative rhetoric, false beliefs, and misinformation about our beautiful nappy hair? In the meantime, to all of my fellow bloggers...Season Greetings and I hope 2008 will be you much love, peace, and joy!
Monica

Lordy Lordy Look Who's 40!

2007-10-12T09:40:00.000-05:00

Can you believe I made it Over the Hill October 5th? Where did the time go? Well I must say it looks a lot better on this side of the hill! My oldest left for the Marines last month and is now realizing the depth of parental guidance and sheltering (smile). One down and three more to go....smile!

2.5 Years Locked

Fortunately, I managed to make it over the hill without any traces of gray hair! What you will notice, however, is that I dyed my hair back to its original dark brown color. You can see the light brown color in the pic on the left. My hair almost looks black in the pic on the right. It was quite a shock when I first did it. I looked so pale, but in time, I've managed to appreciate why God blessed me with my dark brown hair color.

Since I last posted, I've experimented with various styles. I even curled my hair with a hot curling iron! I suppose I was missing the relaxed hair for a bit--crazy, huh? My hair looked flat and stringy....needless to say, I didn't like the look and I have no plans to abuse my hair again. In the end it only helped to solidify my reasoning for continuing on my natural hair and locking journey! In the meanwhile, I'm content with roller setting my hair. At night I'm still sleeping in my lock scrunchie (i.e., lock sock) from http://www.lockscrunchie.com/ . I think I have one in every color and pattern (smile).

17 yr old son with hair blown out!

Oh, almost forgot. My second oldest son pictured above is now locked! Woo Hoo! He's a football player, and mom was tired of cornrolling every 2 weeks (smile)! So, when I went for my last retightening I asked Elaine to start traditional locks on his hair. This is our second attempt at locking his hair. A few years ago we tried with the palm rolling method, but because he has loose curl pattern like me; it failed to lock in a sufficient amount of time. Elaine started his locks with a "brother-lock" similiar pattern to reduce slippage. He's extremely happy and so am I!!!

Braid Out--Take Two

2007-05-21T15:39:00.001-05:00

<Take Two>

3 Day Old Braid Out

It had dawned on me that I hadn't corn-rowed my hair, or at least, attempted to do so in quite a while. To my surprise and delight, I was able to do it without looking like Scarecrow on the Wizard of Oz (smile). The pics you see posted are 3-day old waves from the corn-rows.

2 Years Sisterlocked

2007-04-09T17:24:00.000-05:00

Above Photo: Soft Spiked Curled (2 Days Old)
2 Years...
April 2007

Happy Belated Easter Everyone! Can you believe it actually snowed in Texas? Yes, I mean snow, the white fluffy stuff that makes snowballs! We received close to 3 inches in Killeen! By the end of the week it'll be back up to the 80's! That's the Lone Star state for you. Wow, I can hardly believe two years have gone by already!!! Last month I had Elaine touch up the color, it had been approx. one year since my last coloring. It looks fabulous! Elaine's hands are definitely annointed with God's grace. While browsing through one of the groups I belong to, LocItUp, one of the members was raving on an on about these rollers called, Soft Spike Curlers, and how . Curious, I decided to do some investigation and found that they were founded by Ellen Kelley in 1996, Soft Spikes began after a long search for a better curler for Ellen's Irish dancing daughter, Robin. Soft Spikes generates the best curly hair styles around and is a leader in the area of curly hair products (http://www.softspikecurlers.com/). According to many of its users, the curlers are great for sisterlocks and will give you long lasting curls. Most of the members recommended the original size, as opposed to the larger size curler because it gives a tighter curl. Anyone who knows me, knows that I will try "almost" anything once, so I ordered (3) packs of the original size curlers. What's cool about Soft Spike Curlers is that they come in all colors (i.e., over 60 color combinations)! I currently use the gold Solar curlers, but over time the gold material covering the sponge roller and pipe-cleaner has a tendency to shred. I had previously purchased the Caruso curlers, but the curls do not last long, and because I've been blessed with thick hair, I end up with a lot of body and less curls.

I'm enjoying my much needed break from school; however, I knew I wouldn't rest for too long because I recently applied and was accepted into an alternative teaching certification program. Yes, that would mean back to school once again (smile). The program doesn't begin until June, so I still have some leisure time left. Now that summer is approaching (I think), and I normally sweat very easily, I was thinking of investing in some colorful hair wraps to keep my hair off of my neck. Wow, did I actually say, "keep my hair off of my neck?" Who woulda thunk, huh? Anyway, if anyone can point me in the right direction on where to purchase some really good ones, I'd love to have your input. Thanks to all those who've been supportive in my two-year crawl towards freedom! One Love.

Monica

21 Months

2007-01-30T13:31:00.000-06:00

21 of the Most Wonderful Months...

Happy New Year Everyone! I call this shot "diamonds" because of the sparkling effect that bounces off of my necklace. You may not be able to see it in the pics, but my eyes are scarlet red (irritation from navy blue eyeliner). Since my last post so many things have happened. I finally finished my Masters in Counseling and have started the Ph.D program in Psychology; however, after attending school for the last six years straight, I've discovered that I am truly burned out and need to take a "Monica Break". I've acclimated myself so much into the collegiate environment that my personal social skills have weakened, and thus, I'm off to rediscovering me and spending quality time with my four children.

On to my hair....most of it is fully locked, but still the crown remains stubborn for the most part. Overall, I haven't had much slippage in the past several months. My scalp is extremely dry and still flakes, which is expected during these colder months. However, I'm beginning to wonder if my setting lotion is a contributory factor to this condition. I've tried a variety of setting lotion products, but I still end up with "frosted flakes". I've noticed that curling my hair with solar rollers aids in the locking process because I don't play in my hair as often, it keeps the ends from frizzing, and the curls generally last 1-2 weeks if I take special care in tying my hair up at night. So if you see me walking down the street, don't be surprised to see me sporting curls as opposed to flat twists or a straight style.

News flash: This month I am finally able to pull the top half of my hair completely into a pony tail! This is cause for celebration because over time Elaine (my consultant) cut my hair into layers and it proved to be very difficult to pull all the locks together. I can hardly wait for the day when I can pull ALL of my locks into one beautiful pony tail! I would imagine that won't be for another year or so (smile). Oh, I almost forgot, Elaine hot curled my hair during my last retightening. She curled it towards my face, and because it's been cut into layers the hair style created a beautiful silhouette of my face! Unfortunately, it was extremely rainy that day, so the style didn't last too long. I must admit, it's been so long since I've used a curling iron on my hair, I was a little uncomfortable and concerned about potential damage on my natural hair.

Not much else has changed. I'm still doing the single parent thing, as my husband has decided to work another year in Iraq (that's a whole other blog in and of itself). I still religiously take the Super Biotin daily, and occasionally when I remember; women's multivitamin. As part of rediscovering me, I've started exercising--something I've neglected since starting college. I am soooooo out of shape it's pathetic. Those late nights doing homework made it very difficult to get up in the morning to exercise. So, everyone, until next time; thank you for reading, sending me your comments, and sharing this wonderful journey of a lifetime with me!

Eighteen Months

2006-10-31T08:24:00.000-06:00

Eighteen Months

The journey has been great so far. Over the past few months I've noticed that I
tend to keep my hands out of my hair when it's curled. And thus, I try to curl it as much as possible. I had another growth spurt over the past two months. Just when I thought my growth spurt was over the spring months, there goes mother nature at its best. Since my last entry I had another birthday.....39 and still getting younger (smile). I actually found a gray hair in my eyebrow...ugghhh!!! What's up with that?

Hot New UpDo!

2006-07-14T09:05:00.000-05:00

Hello Everybody! I know I haven't updated in a while--please don't spank me. Whatcha think about my new do? Elaine (my consultant) and I decided to try this new style to help cool me off during these hot summer days. It may be hard to see in the pic but she flat-twisted it all the way around and let the crown "free-fall". I added the hair jewelry for some pizazz.

Wow, I can't believe I'm 15 months old this month (July). How many of us can remember when we were that age? So I guess I'm an official Sisterlock Toddler (smile). Oh, I recently mailed in my application to receive my birth certificate and other SL items. I'll try to do a better job in the future with posting.....still loving my journey!

1 Year Anniversary!

2006-04-26T12:28:00.000-05:00

Day After SL'd 4/15/2005

1 Year Locked After Coloring (Below)

Before Coloring

Happy 1 Year Anniversary (April 14)!

I finally made it to one year being SL. I can't believe time has passed so quickly! If you look closely, you can see one color. Elaine (consultant) clipped some more frizzy balls and trimmed some off my mature locks. Notably, I still have some very stubborn locks that just refuse to join in with the rest of the group. Thanks for all those who prayed for my health when I was in the hospital. It was really scary there for a moment. One benefit to being sick/hospital (it seems), my hair hit a growing phase, especially on my right side. So, I gather that my growing season is around the March/April/May timeframe.

11 Month Curl

2006-03-27T14:10:00.000-06:00

11 Month Curl

I decided to try something different by curling my hair utilizing those Solar soft rollers. I can definitely see that I'm way past due for coloring. Thus, I plan to celebrate my one year Birthday/Anniversary (April 14, 2006) by having my consultant color my locs. If I look a little pale in the pics it is because I had "female" surgery a week ago and I'm just now starting to move around a little better.

10 Months and Still Traveling..

2006-02-12T20:51:00.000-06:00

Pic above was taken at 9 mo SL

I must apologize, these aren't the best photos. It's difficult to see the details of my locs. I have a hair clip on the left side and you cannot see my highlighted ends. I bought a new digital camera, and the golden rule remains the same, "you get what you pay for!" Not to fret, when I take my anniversary pics in two months, I'll be sure to use my Sony digital camera to capture the full effect. I can't believe it's been ten months into my journey. While I admit, there have been some rough periods and frustrations with my hair; overall, I have no regrets and I'm still in love with SL! I think most of my frustrations were due to the expectations I envisioned of my hair at this point in my journey. I envisioned a longer and more even length all around. My sides have grown extremely long, while the back and top seem to be in a resting phase. It makes for difficult styling at times.

For those considering SLs, the best piece of advice I could ever give you is to have "patience". I've discovered that the hair on my sides and crown is resistant to locing! Last month my consultant trimmed the locs in the back and a little on the sides; cutting off the balls at the end of my locs to give it a neater appearance. She stated that because of the "suspect texture" on my crown, she wasn't sure if the crown was ready to be trimmed. As expected, after a few washes, a few locs on the side slipped.

Upon my latest retightening visit I asked Elaine if we could try Dr. Miracle's 2-n-1 shampoo that is supposed to help with dry and itchy scalp. The shampoo contains glycerin, which could impede the locing process on my "resistant" locs. She suggested I wait until my locs are more mature before using that product. To help with my dry and itchy scalp, Elaine did a hot oil treatment before retightening. After retightening, she later massaged a brand (i.e.,Kiehl) oil into my scalp. Elaine recommended that I purchase some tea tree oil to help with the dry scalp. Perhaps it's time I start using the essential fatty acids again.

The following is my current daily vitamin regimen:

Women's multivitamin w/ iron (Vitamin World): 2 tablets
Super Biotin: 10,000 mcg (1,000 mg)
Vitamin C: 500 mg
Retightening Frequency: Every 4-5 weeks

Some of my co-workers asked about me taking the Retightening class so that I didn't have to travel to Dallas once a month. At this point, I have no desire to retighten my own hair. For one, it's thick and I have Carpal Tunnel. Two, having four children, working full time, being a full-time grad student consumes most of my time. My spouse is now retired from the military, but has chosen to return to Iraq; working with a contractor. So, essentially, I'm a single parent of four, on top of my other responsibilities.

Speaking of my spouse....he came home for Christmas and I actually got him to escort me to a retightening session. I was amazed that he had the patience to sit for 2+ hours. When I think about it, in the 18 years we've been together, he's never accompanied me to a beauty salon when I had relaxed hair, let alone sit the entire time while I was getting it done! I think it's safe to say that SLs has converted him (smile)!

Desire of the Woman

2006-02-08T11:43:00.000-06:00

"Desire of the Woman"

We are fashioned for intimacy. We long for love and a sense of true caring. Yet, because of the Fall, we are broken people living in a world of broken people. We move toward others, based not so much on what they need, but rather on what we need, endeavoring somehow to slake the hidden thirst deep within our souls.

Our need for relationship is legitimate; it is there by God's design. To have healthy, functional relationships, however, it is essential that we sort out what God, our "Source," intended to be to us.

One of the foundations being exposed today is the "desire of the woman"—the belief that her husband can be her source of life, that he can meet her need for her life, he will "rule" her emotionally. She is "up" if things are going well. If not, she becomes hurt, discouraged, and depressed. Ruled by her husband—her heart, her "center." Having been turned from God to man—she is not able to be the help for him she was created to be. She is drinking from a broken cistern (see Jer. 2:13). She has the right expectation, but the wrong source.

Whatever we think will satisfy our longing will become our god. Satisfaction found in a wrong source, a false god, is always temporary, doomed to failure and disappointment. False gods are addictive because we must come again and again for refilling; what they can give us is never enough. We become slaves to what we think will fill the empty wells inside of us.
God wants us to find our "being" needs in Him; no human can fulfill them. When we find our life in Him, we will discover we can let go of our demands on others. We can then begin to move in genuine relationship with them because they are no longer the source of our identity and security. Until this occurs, real intimacy cannot begin to take place.

When a woman's heart is turned—when she sets her desire back on God—a new freedom comes. The grasping in her voice and her attitude goes. She is able to move into relationship with her husband based on wholeness rather than inappropriate neediness, hurt, and woundedness. She is able to speak into his life with more effectiveness because her worth and identity no longer depend on his response. When the woman stops looking to her husband for the needs he cannot meet, she frees him to meet the ones he can: the need for intimacy and shared responsibility for the marriage and family.

This is a key factor in what God is doing today in the hearts of women around the world. He is turning the centers of women, teaching them to deny themselves, their own strength, and to find their Source in Him. God is teaching them to live by the "tree of life," the life of God in them. He is freeing them from the broken cisterns of their own making and fashioning them anew, restoring the man's help to him.---Jane Hansen

Eve

Eve was the original first lady. She was not only a woman's first experience with God, but God's first experience with a woman. She was the first to delight the Father's heart as only a daughter can. She was the first to grace this Earth with the ways of a woman and the first to encounter the wiles of the devil. She was the first to love a man and the first to mislead one. She was the first to know the love of God and the first to suffer the curse of fallen humanity. She was the one after whom every woman who has ever lived has followed.
You, too, are a daughter of God. You were created and called according to His purpose. He may be calling you, like Eve, to pioneer. His destiny for your life may include some unexplored or unexpected territory. So go boldly after Him. Follow Him with all your heart. And if He asks you to do for Him what has not been done before, remember Eve. She had no mentor, no mother, no older female friend to help her on her way. She had only God; and if you ever find yourself as a first lady, He will be there to help you blaze every trial and break open every new day! --Author Unknown

5 Months Sisterlocked

2006-02-08T10:38:00.000-06:00

Happy 1-Year Naptural Anniversary!

2006-02-08T10:37:00.000-06:00

June 5, 2005

Wow, I can't believe it's been one year since I did the big chop! It's been an intense journey so far, and I have no regrets whatsoever. Since I got Sisterlocked almost 2 months ago (April 14th), my hair is growing like weeds. I have noticed; however, that my scalp is extremely dry around the hairline. I think it's in part due to the SL starter shampoo. It contains special ingredients to help facilitate the locking process. I've also read from other SL wearer's that their scalp is dry since they began using the shampoo. I spoke with my consultant, Elaine, and she assured me that it would subside in a few months. I did have some slippage, but not enough to cause concern. I waited 5 weeks before my first retightening session and it took 3 hours ($90) for Elaine to retighten my hair! To save money, I wanted to stretch these sessions out to 8 weeks instead of every 4-6 weeks. However, with my growth rate, Elaine recommended that I come in about every 6 weeks for retightening.

A New Style

2006-02-08T10:29:00.000-06:00

March 2005
9 Months Natural!

Single Twists

Can you believe how much my hair has grown? It's close to four inches now and I still love it. I had my stylist put in some single twists to help with manageability while I wait to have my SL's put in. Speaking of which, I have my consultation appointment this weekend (March 12th).

My husband is back from Iraq now and his initial reaction to my natural hair was not favorable! I must admit it did hurt my feelings a little bit, but not enough to make me put a relaxer in it. I also had a hair catastrophe a few weeks ago. I tried dying my hair back to its natural color and ended up with black hair! You know how hard it is to lighten hair once it's been dyed black. I had to put in bleach and then follow up with a medium brown tint. Boy was I scared of hair loss! Surprisingly, nothing changed but the hair color, not even my texture. My stylist recommended that I condition, condition, condition, and that's what I'm doing!

Something Different

2006-02-08T10:23:00.000-06:00

November 5, 2004
5 Months Natural

Two-week old Braids

I became impatient with what seemed like slow growth of my hair and decided to get it braided. Frustrated with the odd length of my hair, I had begun experimenting with different products, which was not only unhealthy for my hair, but quite expensive. So, I opted for some good ole' single, or "box" braids. It was done on October 23, 2004. I insisted that my braider be extremely gentle around my hairline, as it is known to easily break under stress and manipulation. Ayanna, my braider did an excellent job, and most of all, she listened to my demands for not-so-tight braids around the hairline! It took her about 6 hours to complete my entire head. I expressed to her that my goal was to allow my natural hair to grow in order to start locing. She completely understood because her hair is locked with traditional locs. So, we established a plan of keeping my hair continually braided, with touch-up braids as the new-growth grows out.

I experienced a lot of itching of course, considering that I used 100% Kanekalon hair, and I no-poo'd twice since getting my hair braided, and I've utilized Sea Breeze to help control the itching. My scalp was a little flakey, but I think that was a result from not thoroughly washing out all of the conditioner. I'll have to be more careful. In addition, my braider told me to stay away from lotions and use oils to keep the dirt and lint build-up at a minimum. I did purchase some medicated braid spray, which works well. My hair should reach 3-4 inches by February-March, but I probably won't get Sisterlocked until April or May. My plate is going to be full during those months, and besides, I'd rather wait until the weather warms back up before exposing my scalp. I'm still taking all of those vitamins. I'm thinking about cutting back and just taking the Women's multivitamin and the Hair, Skin & Nails vitamin.

Choice of Freedom

2006-02-08T10:16:00.000-06:00

Three and Four Months Natural

Well, I’ve been busy these two months trying to decide what I wanted to do with my hair. After careful research and exploration, I’ve decided to get Sisterlocks http://www.sisterlocks.com/ it’s more than a hairstyle, it’s a lifestyle. Unfortunately, my hair is only about 2 inches now, and the consultant that I plan to go to wants at least 3-4 inches. So, it looks like I’ll have to wait patiently. In the meantime, it gives me the chance to save my money for the process, as it is not cheap. It runs anywhere from $425-550 and up, depending on your length.

The consultant I spoke with works in a shop called Your Best Image Salon and his name is Greg Day. He actually recommended that I stick with a TWA, but I want versatility and the look of relaxed hair without having to use chemicals. I also found a support group called Lock It Up to help me with my new journal http://www.egroups.com/group/lockitup I’ve learned tons of information about my pending “rebirth” and I just cannot wait. I would like to have it done before my husband returns home from Iraq, as I’m sure the price alone would send him through the roof!

I was told by another loctician that my hair has a medium to large curl pattern. I call it a “lazy” curl. I’m a little disappointed because I thought I would have the instant “S-shaped” curls like my 8-year old daughter. The beautician also told me that it may take up to one year being chemical-free before I’d see my true curl pattern. I guess it makes since because I’ve been relaxing for 15 years, so it could take some time to regroup.

The loctician confirmed that it’s very normal to hair several different hair types on your head (I thought I was going crazy). I have S-curls in the back, strays on the side, and cotton puffs in the front. I even have some strands of hair that are 3-4 inches long, while others are only 1 inch. I’m going to wait until January or February before giving Greg another call. In the meantime, I’ll be praying and asking that I have minimum breakage and lots of growth.
I’ve added a multivitamin to my list of vitamins. It’s a Women’s Ultra Multivitamin from GNC. That baby is huge (smile)!

My impatience and frustration is getting the best of me; I've decided to get my hair braided while I wait out the growth process. I have an appointment on 23 October 2004 to get individual braids. Perhaps this will help me to leave my hair alone.

Two Months and Counting

2006-02-08T10:10:00.000-06:00

5 August 2004
2 Months Natural

I've been getting several compliments on the texture of my hair and its rate of growth. I'm beginning to realize what is meant by the shrinkage effect. My hair truly is a lot longer than it appears. It's just so frustrating at times because I look at my hair and I see no change, however, it has gotten thicker and healthier. I can see a slight difference, even from last month. I've also been getting comments about me having "good" hair and that's why it looks so pretty. Most of my co-workers know that my mother is bi-racial; therefore, they equate that with me having a nice grade of hair. Personally, I think they're just using it as a way to avoid going natural. They don't think their hair will look pretty, or as pretty as mine because I have white blood somewhere deep in my veins! I tell them all the time; I have "African American" hair. I'm not bi-racial, my mother is. They can have the same or similar results as I have had since going natural; it just takes patience, and understanding of self. Caring and wearing natural hair isn't for everyone, but if it's something desirable then one should experiment with its ideology. I'm very comfortable in my skin and my hair; it's other people who are not. For me, it's like succumbing to putting chemical straighteners in the African American beautiful; naturally curly hair is like telling God you don't trust his judgment! After all, he made our race out of his own design, and he knows what is best and what will be best, even when we don't understand his motives. As you can see, the subject of natural hair has really touched my life in such a profound way. I want to go and shake every African American woman with relaxers in their hair and tell them, "Loose yourself from Societal Prison and the Prison of Hair Relaxers". "Love yourself and the uniqueness of your hair, it is truly divine and like no other!" "Tell your black daughters that their hair is beautiful, and teach them about caring for their unique hair!" Excuse me, I'm just venting.

I put in a semi-permanent hair color (lighter brown), but it's barely noticeable. Believe it or not, but I like my natural color better! A few friends suggested I bleach my hair blonde—NO WAY! Talk about killing your hair…..I may as well put a relaxer in my hair (smile). I still have my wigs and when I'm ready for a different look, I'll just put one of them on. In the meantime, I'll still with brown hair. My hair care regiment is still the same, no alterations, nor additional hair care products added. I ran out of the Evening Primrose Oil pills, so I purchased the complete Essential Fatty Acids (EFA) needed for healthy hair, skin and nails. It contains Omega-3, Omega-6, Flaxseed Oil, Borage Oil, Gelatin and other oils. I also ran out of the GNC NourisHair Multivitamins and I decided to purchase the Hair, Skin and Nails (HSN) vitamins that they sell. The HSN contains a lot more Biotin than the NourisHair does so we'll see if my rate of growth increases.

Biotin: 5,550 mcg (increased by 1300 mcg)
MSM: 2,000 mg.
EFA Complete: 2 Daily
Pantothenic Acid (B5): 500 mg.
Hair, Skin and Nails Vitamin: 2 Daily

My one weakness that is a struggle for me is my diet. I lead a hectic lifestyle like most Western Americans, and my diet is horrible. Most times I have a SlimFast for breakfast, a snack, a can of soup for lunch or fastfood, and dinner is usually a prepared Lean Cuisine meal followed by another snack. I need more protein, fruits and vegetables. Let's face it, hair grows from within, so if your diet isn't healthy; it will show it in your hair, skin and nails! Vitamins alone aren't sufficient for healthy, long hair.

One Month Natural

2006-02-08T10:06:00.000-06:00

July 5, 2004

1 Month Natural

A quick note: My vitamin regimen has changed to the following:

Biotin: 4,250 mcg
MSM: 2,000 mg.
Evening Primrose: 1,000 mg.
Pantothenic Acid (B5): 500 mg.
NourisHair Multivitmain (GNC): 500 mg.

My hair feels softer to the touch, and I’ve noticed that it’s taking on the formation of a curl. I’m thinking that I have type 4a hair, with 3c around the temples. I really love the Apple Cider Vinegar rinse. It totally changed my hair texture! Immediately after I rinsed, I noticed that my natural curls began to show through. I’m really growing to liking my natural hair; I just don’t care for other people’s comments. It’s amazing to discover how many African American women and men are still uncomfortable with natural hair (more women than men).

15 July 2004 (6 weeks)

I cut a few strays (split ends), but then I noticed that it was useless because my hair is still too short. My hair is getting curler by the day. My normal routine is to "no-poo" every other day with V05 Kiwi Conditioner, mixed with Apple Cider Vinegar and Lemon juice. Sometimes I let it saturate my hair before rinsing. I've also enforced washing with warm water and rinsing with cool water. This is something I don't normally do—I usually wash and rinse with hot water! I finish with either Aussie's detangling moisturizer or Luster's Curl Activator/Moisturizer and CareFree Curl Gold Activator. I blot any excess and wrap with a silk scarf. I am still amazed that my hair texture is so curly. Last summer, when I attempted to go natural, I wound up putting in a texturizer. I loved my hair as long as it was moist, however, when dry, it felt like a brillo pad! Now, my hair is just as curly as it was when I had a texturizer, but now it's healthier.

I've been taking vitamins for almost a month now and I've noticed significant changes in my skin. It's not as dry and the tone has improved overall. Along my hairline I suffered traction alopecia on my right temple, but now it's hardly noticeable!

Awakening

2006-02-08T10:03:00.000-06:00

June 24, 2004

I found a great web site full of information about caring for my natural hair http://www.motowngirl.com The web site really motivated me to pay closer attention to the ingredients found in shampoos and so-called conditioners made for African American hair. Since viewing this web site, I have stopped shampooing my hair, and commenced to “No Poos”, and started a vitamin regimen, which is detrimental for growing and maintaining the root. It’s very difficult for me to swallow large pills, or any sized pills for that matter, so I’m a little hesitant about starting the vitamin regimen. I purchased 1 container of Vitaballs (multivitamin gumball), 2 bottles of Biotin (300mcg) and 1 bottle of Evening Primrose Oil (500mg). The Biotin pills are “tweeney-eeney-weeney” pills, which was a pleasant surprise!

I’m going to try to put more natural ingredients in my hair. This will be a “trial and error” experiment, so be patient! I put 2 parts honey and 1 part water to add shine. Well, I got shine, but I didn’t like the texture of my hair. I added too much honey! I think I’ll stick to olive oil and other natural oils for now.

June 26, 2004

Just a quick entry to note that I purchased MSM (500mg) my vitamin regimen consists of 1 multivitamin, Biotin (3090 mcg), MSM (2000mg), Evening Primrose Oil (1000 mg). Watching hair growth is like watching a snail move (smile)! I’ll be taking my 1-month pics this weekend. Hooray!

Decisions, Decisions: The Big Chop

2006-02-08T10:01:00.000-06:00

Greetings Everyone!

I just wanted everyone to know that today, June 5, 2004. I did it! I shaved all chemicals out of my hair (The Big Chop)! I've longed to be reintroduced to my natural hair. It's been over 25 years that I've been running from it! Well no more! It's going to be a rough transition, but this too shall pass! I will be accepted and appreciated for who I am, and not what I look like. Call me a rebel or whatever term makes you comfortable, just remember, we make "hair", "hair" does not make us! My philosophy, "Hair today, gone tomorrow!" For some of you this may be a shock and you may even disagree with what I've done; for others, well............you know me--I rarely care what others think anyway. God bless all.

Last Chemical Relaxer: 30 April 2004
Last Color Treatment: 13 May 2004
Self haircut- Length is about 1/8” The Big Chop – 5 June 2004